Me.jpg (12277 bytes)

Hi there...this is me. Mom said I got all the good looks and no brains. I love being a babe hound. Girls make spit roll down my chin. I have a stomach problem and fart a lot.


MyMom.jpg (6588 bytes)

This is my mom. She has lots of boyfriends. One of them even has a job. She says with a little luck I could be a garbage man one day.


BrotherInJail.jpg (8077 bytes)

This is my brother Hank. He is in jail right now. When he gets out he is not allowed to be around animals and kitchen appliances.


Grandmom.jpg (5831 bytes)

My grandmom lives with us in our trailer. Shes smells real bad. She likes to hang out in bars and drink beer. Grandma has sores all over and they leak yellow stuff on the furniture. The flies are terrible.


MyDad.jpg (11433 bytes)

My mom says she is almost positive this is my dad. He lives in a Federal Penitentiary in Montana. When he gets out in 55 years we are going fishing.


DadsTruck.jpg (20043 bytes)

This is my dads truck. The blood stains inside are almost all gone.



SisterJill.jpg (7213 bytes)

My younger sister Jill lost all her teeth. She was licking an egg beater after mom made a cake and my cousin Jimmy turned it on by accident.


BrotherBarney.jpg (6841 bytes)

We are proud of my older brother Barney. He is only 27 and already in the 4th grade. He wants to be a Doctor and can write his own name.


HalfBrotherJimBob.jpg (10480 bytes)

My half brother JimBob and his wife. She's a hottie. They raise Possum in their back yard. They are not allowed to have children.


Sue.jpg (7467 bytes)

This is my older sister Betty. She has 15 kids and they all look different. We depend on her welfare check to get by. She has a disease that makes her itch.


Jethro.jpg (8234 bytes)

Jethro is my 1st cousin. He runs a tomato stand down by the highway. He once went 53 days without taking a bath.


Dentist.jpg (6834 bytes)

This is Buck. He is my second cousin. He is pretty smart. Buck is going to be a dentist some day. He does all the work on our teeth.


Larry.jpg (6327 bytes)

This is my sisters boyfriend for now. His name is Larry. He fixes lawn mowers in the city. My sister says he has a hairy butt.


Mike.jpg (7154 bytes)

This is Michael. He used to be my best friend but got killed by a bus on the interstate. I still wear his underwear.


2kids.jpg (10644 bytes)

These are 2 kids we throw stuff at. There used to be 3 of them. Mom says we can't throw heavy stuff no more.


Jake.jpg (11338 bytes)

George holds the park record. He once jumped over 7 trailers. George crashed a lot and talks real slow now. His doctor told him to wear a helmet.


UncleMarky.jpg (15276 bytes)

My uncle Marky is still having problems. He doesn't know what he wants in life anymore. He is a Veitnam War hero and now sells perfume at a department store.


StepBrotherPhil.jpg (6785 bytes)

This is my step brother Phil. He had a hunting accident years ago. The bullet is lodged just over his right ear. It's hard to understand him sometimes and he always stinks like rotten cheese.